People Pleasing, AI Therapy, and Sexual Transference: May Mailbag

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

In this very fun episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest open the mailbag and answer questions from listeners about people pleasing, the potential (and pitfalls) of using AI as a therapist, and what to do when you develop strong feelings for your therapist. They discuss existential themes like aloneness and agency, whether Gandalf would have made a good therapist, and close with some heartfelt thoughts about what supports a long and loving relationship.

Rick’s Attachment Course: Rick is offering a 5-week course on healing insecure attachment that helps people work through attachment issues and improve their relationships. All the sessions are up now, and there's a live Q&A event on May 27, 2025 at 12pm PT via Zoom. You can learn more at RickHanson.com/attachment and get 25% off with coupon code BeingWell25.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction and Opening Banter

2:50: Question 1: People-Pleasing vs. Prosocial Advice for Depression

6:10: Follow-Up: Do We Train Others to Ignore Our Needs?

11:20: Creating Reciprocal Relationships

12:23: Question 2: AI as a Therapist

31:16: Question 3: Sexual Transference in Therapy

39:56: Question 4: Is Remembering That We’re ‘Ultimately Alone’ Helpful?

56:55: Question 5: What’s the Secret to a Long and Happy Marriage?

1:07:13: Wrap-Up and Final Thoughts

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