EPISODE 5 - GLUTTONY - FEED THE SOUL & NOURISH THE SPIRIT - "HEY! RHONDA, SKIP A MEAL!"

The GOOD Influence - HER

"You must be the change you wish to see in the world," Mahatma Gandhi.

WOW...DID you catch the title?

Yup, a High School Friend who I supported through thick and thin...literally...shouted out across the High School cafeteria...in fact, it was a set-up so everyone could laugh at my expense...HE said, "Hey, Rhonda skip a meal." OMG!!!

I had a second burrito in my hand heading for my mouth to take a big bite. I had no idea a group of boys was watching me eat. I thought I was discrete taking a second burrito so my cover was blown.
What hurt was that the comment came from a boy I trusted, praised, and supported. This CAUSED me to have serious trust issues and to cut off my emotions....NO MORE FEELING ANYTHING UNLESS I HAD TOTAL CONTROL.

I have an eating disorder. I love Food! I am a GLUTTON. I used to be bulimic. IT'S BEEN DECADES SINCE I HAVE DONE THAT and I AM SO PROUD OF MY RECOVERY!

I was a chubby child. I have always been warned that I was going to be a BIG FAT BLACK WOMAN (like that is the worst thing in the world to be.) The adverse effect of being told that is that I am NOT a BIG FAT BLACK WOMAN...I am a size 0.

I have what many people are suffering from today is "FOOD INSECURITY." I was never sure if there was ever going to be enough food on the table for me and my family growing up. I am embarrassed to share this, but that is the truth. We struggled with housing, food, and money....we were not the "The Brady Bunch" that I IDEALIZED with a maid named Alice who cooked and cleaned. Don't get me wrong there was love but a lot of struggle that I tried to hide to be the perfect girl.

So, being a GLUTTON WITH FOOD was now a journey of eating for pleasure and cutting off feelings with and for humans...I did not want to feel any emotions.
"GLUTTONY"...THE FOURTH ON MY LIST OF THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS...(Latin: gula) is the overindulgence and overconsumption of food, money, sex, etc... to the point of excess waste. The root word comes from the Latin gluttire, to gulp down or swallow.

So, I was NOT feeding my soul or nourishing my spirit. I am being this candid because I know, I just know that I will connect with you on a deeper level so you can see that you can recover, learn to love yourself, forgive others, and live the life of your dreams or better! This is how I believe I am a "GOOD" influence in your life by sharing my truth.
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