888: Heather Boorman-Morris: An Intimate Look at Covert Narcissistic Abuse

Shameless Leadership

Heather Boorman-Morris, LCSW lives a life of truth-telling, compassion, and curiosity. She dedicates her professional work to advocate for individual and systemic wellness, and does so through her writing, speaking, and outpatient therapy practice specializing in trauma and neurodiversity. After awakening to the truth that she had been living in an abusive relationship for two decades, Heather expanded her advocacy work to challenge society’s inaccurate conceptions of who gets abused and what abusers look like.

Her latest book, A Thousand Paper Cuts, brings readers inside the mind, heart, and experiences of a victim of covert narcissistic abuse. With raw vulnerability, Heather shares her story, from love bombing to devaluing to freedom, highlighting the destructiveness an abuser can have without ever raising his fist.

Over the last few years, different forms of narcissism and abuse in the form of coercive control have come on my radar. This kind of abuse is among the most dangerous forms of abuse because of how long it takes victims to realize they are being abused. I know people who have experienced this form of abuse in their marriages and in family relationships such as mother/daughter relationships. Because these kinds of abusers are so charming and charismatic to the outside world, their victims often feel they will not be believed if they share their abuse. And so they keep quiet for years, if not decades.

When Heather reached out to me to talk about her experience in getting out of a marriage where she was the victim of what I now know is called covert narcissistic abuse as well as her professional experience as a therapist uncovering the data around this kind of abuse, I immediately said yes. This conversation is so important. It is very likely that you know someone enduring a relationship with a covert narcissist.

Listen in to hear Heather share:

• How narcissism personality disorder exists on a spectrum and the difference between overt and covert narcissism
• How she got involved in a relationship with a narcissist and what the coercive control looked like from the very beginning of their relationship
• What narcissists are looking for when they seek out partners
• How she recognized 19 years into her marriage that she was in an abusive relationship
• The vulnerability and massive fear of engaging her family and friends to help her see how she had been gaslit over the years
• How she finally got out of her marriage
• Her decision to write about her story
• What someone can do if they think they are in an abusive relationship with a narc/covert abuser

Links mentioned:

• Get information about my September Influence & Ignite Retreat for Women Business Owners: shamelessmom.com/retreat
• Connect with Heather: www.heatherboormanmorris.com
• Book: A Thousand Paper Cuts
• Podcast with Heather and Antwan: www.startingstronger.com
• Heather’s Podcast: www.thefringybit.com
• Heather on Facebook
• Instagram:@ startingstrongerpodcast and @thefringybit

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