229. “I’m almost 50 and have nothing to show for my life”

Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi

Christine (47) and Thad (57) have been together for more than six years, but instead of building wealth, they’re buried under nearly $340,000 of debt.

Christine, the self-appointed “CFO,” is exhausted from tracking every bill, while Thad avoids the details and spends freely. Their conflicting money mindsets (Christine craving stability, Thad living for the moment) have stalled their big dreams like buying a home or taking Rich Life vacations that Christine longs for. With almost no savings and retirement looming, Christine fears she’s approaching 50 with nothing to show for her hard work, while Thad insists a single plan will solve everything.

Can Ramit help them break the cycle of avoidance and control, align their priorities, and finally start acting like teammates?

In this episode we uncover:

• Why Christine feels she’s approaching 50 with “nothing to show” for her life

• Thad’s $17,000 student loan that ballooned up to $125,000

• How Christine became the household “CFO” while Thad continues to avoid responsibility

• Their real numbers—and why Christine feels so stressed

• Christine’s frustration over micromanaging bills

• Thad’s upbringing in poverty

• The invisible power of shame and fear, and why they can’t see what’s right in front of them financially

• Christine’s childhood lessons from parents who bought an unaffordable home

• Thad’s stark admission: if nothing changes, he’ll be homeless

Chapters:

(00:00:00) When a worrier and an avoider meet…

(00:02:59) “We have a plan… don’t we?”

(00:15:52) “Where is all the money going?”

(00:19:54) Ramit breaks down their numbers

(00:33:46) “I never expected to live past 30”

(00:48:30) “I wish my dad was able to say no”

(00:56:33) “I don’t believe he’ll follow through”

(01:05:11) “We need to be playing way bigger”

(01:22:38) “I don’t feel like I have the power”

(01:36:54) Where are they now? Christine and Thad’s follow-ups

This episode is brought to you by:

Doola | Go to https://doola.com.ramit and use code RAMIT for 10% off LLC formation and bookkeeping.

Gelt | Book a tax consultation with Gelt at https://joingelt.com/ramit. As a member of my community, you can skip the waitlist.

DeleteMe | If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit for 20% off.

Masterclass | For unlimited access to every class and 15% off an annual membership, go to https://masterclass.com/ramit

Netsuite | Download the CFO's Guide to AI and Machine Learning at https://netsuite.com/ramit

Connect with Ramit

• Get my new book, Money For Couples

• Get Money Coaching with Ramit

• Download the Conscious Spending Plan

• Listen to my book—now on Audible

• Get my New York Times best-selling book

• Get my no-numbers journal

• Other episodes

• Instagram

• Twitter

• YouTube

If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.