Secret Confessions of a Mom Who Wants to Quit

Bridge of the Faithful

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Motherhood is hard. I definitely am not able to “enjoy every moment” that many people lovingly offer as advice to moms with children at home. Actually, the more I dig deeper into motherhood, the more I realize how much of a battleground it truly is. Satan hates motherhood, and sadly, a lot of times he is successful at getting me to hate it as well. I have found it to be incredibly freeing to discuss this openly, to admit my faults in hopes that others can relate and feel less alone (and selfishly, so that I feel less alone as well). The more I’ve shared, the more I realize how trapped so many of us mamas are in the lies: that motherhood is too hard; that we are alone; that we’ve messed up too much for redemption; that we don’t deserve rest; that God doesn’t care about the unique struggles that we are facing as parents. I recorded this episode in the middle of one of my deepest, darkest moments as a mom. I didn’t know what God was doing, or even where He was. I felt (and still often do) lost, confused, betrayed, much like the Israelites at the Red Sea and the Disciples during Jesus’ nap on the turbulent boat. I found myself, like them, asking “God, don’t you care?!”
And then I remembered all of the work I’ve done for this podcast over the past 3 years. God never leaves ashes and pain as the ending of the story. So this episode is a raw, honest, unscripted confession of many of the things I’ve battled as a mother. In the end, like all of the amazing stories of God’s faithfulness, He showed me that He is indeed working. The seeds I’m sowing now in tears will be harvested someday with songs of joy.
Psalm 126:5-6 – Those who plant in tears will harvest with shouts of joy. They weep as they go to plant their seed, but they sing as they return with the harvest.