Episode 176: Elise Loehnen - On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins & the Price Women Pay To Be Good

The Revelation Project

Welcome to the Revelation Project podcast, where we disrupt the trance of unworthiness to guide women to remember and reveal the truth of who we are.

In this episode, my guest, Elise Loehnen, joins me to discuss her New York Times Best-Selling Book, *On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins And The Price Women Pay To Be Good. * She is also a successful writer, editor, and host of the wildly popular _*Pulling the Thread *_podcast.

Elise begins by sharing what led her to write this book- and her experience with chronic hyperventilation disorder, an anxiety disorder, and her challenge to get to the root of it.

Elise discusses the symptoms, treatments and dissonance between her interior struggle and her outward demeanor of success. She reflects on the pressures she began to identify, which led her to the revelation that the underpinnings of her stress and striving were rooted in her unconscious allegiance to “good girl” programming.

By revealing the systems of patriarchy and its complex impact on women, Elise delves into early Christianity and the subjugation of women throughout history. We touch on the origins and transformation of the Seven Deadly Sins, the elevation and vilification of Mary Magdalene, and how this impacts us even today.

Throughout the episode, we weave in behaviors that hold us back as women such as jealousy and envy, and the role they play in women's lives. We also discuss the societal expectations placed on women and the need to free ourselves from external validation

The conversation ends with a powerful message about embracing the feminine and reclaiming feminine values to create change in ourselves and in society.

Topics Discussed:

• The Origin of the Seven Deadly Sins
• The “Boogyman of patriarchy”
• Elise's experience with chronic hyperventilation disorder and getting to the root of it.
• Exploring the pressures to be enough and the internal voices of self-doubt
• Understanding the concept of patriarchy and its roots in early Christianity
• The elevation and vilification of Mary Magdalene
• Embracing the feminine and reclaiming feminine values
• The importance of embracing curiosity and personal exploration

** Mentioned:**

• Pulling the Thread podcast
• Seven Deadly Sins
• Mary Magdalene
• Pope Gregory I
• Lynn Twist

Bio
Elise Loehnen Fissmer is a writer, editor, and the host of the podcast, Pulling the Thread, living in Los Angeles with her husband, Rob, and their sons, Max and Sam. While she’s co-written 12 books, including five New York Times Best Sellers, she’s currently writing the first book under her own name for Dial Press, an imprint of Penguin Random House. Previously, she was the chief content officer of goop. While there, Elise co-hosted The goop Podcast and The goop Lab on Netflix, and led the brand’s content strategy and programming, including the launch of a magazine with Condé Nast and a book imprint. For the podcast, she interviewed 100s of thought leaders, doctors, and experts, including Ibram X Kendi, Bryan Stevenson, Nicholas Kristof, Ambassador Samantha Power, Rebecca Traister, John & Julie Gottman, among others.

Prior to goop, she was the editorial projects director of Conde Nast Traveler. Before Traveler, she was the editor at large and deputy editor of Lucky Magazine, where she also served as the on-air spokesperson, appearing regularly on shows like Today, E!, Good Morning America, and The Early Show. She has a B.A. from Yale and majored in English and Fine Arts; she also went to St. Paul’s School in Concord, New Hampshire. Before that, she attended a school where lunchtimes were spent jumping an irrigation ditch. Originally from Missoula, Montana, it's important to her that people know that she went to the National Mathletes Championship when she was in 8th grade and that she’s a horse whisperer. These days, she serves on two boards (Jeni’s Splendid Ice Creams and Skinfix), advises a beauty bio-tech start-up (Arcaea), and spends her time writing, reading, and fundraising for causes and politicians focused on environmental action, social justice, women and children’s health, and a more equitable world.

Special Guest: Elise Loehnen.

Sponsored By:

• Rockstar Camp for Women: Rockstar Camp is a LIVE somatic experiential learning adventure in a container of Sisterhood. It is not for the faint of heart. It is for you. Confidence, Boldness, and Irresistibility will be forever imprinted in your DNA.

Support The Revelation Project

Links:

• Website: Elise Loehnen
• Weekly Newsletter: Substack
• Podcast: Pulling the Thread
• Instagram: Elise Loehnen (Fissmer) (@eliseloehnen)
• Book: On Our Best Behavior — Elise Loehnen
• On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good: Loehnen, Elise