Contractual Love vs Unconditional Love

The Dr. Shyamala Show

What if the thing blocking intimacy is the contract you didn't even know you signed?

Not a legal one.

A silent one.

The one that says: "If you meet my needs, I'll meet yours." "If you make me feel safe, I'll stay open." "If you act how I expect, I'll keep loving you."

It's a model most of us inherited. A tit-for-tat paradigm of partnership. One that feels familiar, even responsible.

But also: One that quietly contracts our capacity for intimacy.

This week on the podcast, I'm pulling back the curtain on the very personal experiment I'm doing in my own relationship — one that's challenging everything I used to believe about love.

After years as a couples therapist… After 15+ years in a former marriage… After guiding thousands of relationships toward healing…

I find myself asking a question I've never fully answered:

Can love be unconditional, even in romantic partnership?

Inside this episode, I share: *What I've seen in my work with couples — and why many of us are still playing by outdated rules

*How conditional love quietly kills desire

*Why freedom is the hidden ingredient for long-term intimacy

*And the personal practice I'm exploring daily to expand my capacity for love

This isn't a story of perfection. It's a story of practice.

A story about what happens when you stop trying to earn love — and start learning how to live it.

If you've ever felt like love must be negotiated… If you've ever questioned what it means to be fully seen, fully chosen, fully free…

Let this episode be a mirror.

Website - https://www.shyamalakiru.com/