From Missing the Mark to Finding Her Voice: Eliza Fricker on Becoming Unquiet

This Voice is Mine: the Unquiet Podcast

In this opening episode of This Voice Is Mine: The Unquiet Podcast, Dr Emma Offord sits down with author, illustrator and PDA/autism advocate Eliza Fricker, the creator of Missing the Mark and Sunday Times bestseller Can’t Not Won’t, to talk about what happens when life “goes nuclear” and the mask finally slips.

Eliza shares the story of her daughter’s breakdown from school, the loneliness of being disbelieved as a mother, and how drawing rooftops from a high-up flat became her way to keep going when everything else fell apart.

Emma and Eliza name what so many families live through but rarely have language for: school trauma and neurodivergent-specific trauma, and the thousands of small, accumulating hurts that never show up in a single incident report.

Together they explore:

• How Eliza’s blog Missing the Mark began as catharsis and became a lifeline for parents and professionals
• Masking, fawning and the shame of being “too much” or “too rude” when you finally speak up
• The sensory assault of institutions, strip lights, lanyards and plastic chairs, and why “school is safe” is a dangerous myth for many
• Middle age, motherhood and what it means to “grow full size” as a late-identified neurodivergent woman
• Building genuinely safe spaces where parents can say the real, messy things out loud

If you’ve ever come out of a school meeting smiling on the outside and shattered on the inside, felt like you must be the problem, or worried you’re “making a fuss”, this conversation is for you. You are not alone, and your unquiet voice matters more than you think.