“Lack of Social Grace is a Lack of Skill” by Screwtape

LessWrong (Curated & Popular)

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I have claimed that one of the fundamental questions of rationality is “what am I about to do and what will happen next?” One of the domains I ask this question the most is in social situations.
There are a great many skills in the world. If I had the time and resources to do so, I’d want to master all of them. Wilderness survival, automotive repair, the Japanese language, calculus, heart surgery, French cooking, sailing, underwater basket weaving, architecture, Mexican cooking, functional programming, whatever it is people mean when they say “hey man, just let him cook.” My inability to speak fluent Japanese isn’t a sin or a crime. However, it isn’t a virtue either; If I had the option to snap my fingers and instantly acquire the knowledge, I’d do it.
Now, there's a different question of prioritization; I tend to pick new skills to learn by a combination of what's useful to me, what sounds fun, and what I’m naturally good at. I picked up the basics of computer programming easily, I enjoy doing it, and it turned out to pay really well. That was an over-determined skill to learn.
On the other [...]
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The original text contained 2 footnotes which were omitted from this narration.
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First published:
November 3rd, 2025
Source:
https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/NnTwbvvsPg5kj3BKq/lack-of-social-grace-is-a-lack-of-skill-1
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Narrated by TYPE III AUDIO.
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