9.14 | Scars [with Tai Gooden]

1:57:18
 
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OK. Where do we begin with this long-awaited episode of The Walking Dead? Our friend Tai Gooden helps us break this down.

What started as excitement to see our main woman, Michonne (Danai Gurira), step into the spotlight turned to horror over what we were watching. The kids? Eff them kids. Yes, they deserved to die and we hope they burn in hell! No, we were more than a little disgusted to see Michonne brutalized again. Tussling with the Governor's men? Check. Savage fight with the actual Governor? Check. Beat up by a MMA fighter disguised as a trash lady? Check. Knocked out by a demon child while pregnant? Check. Branded while pregnant? Check. Beaten with a wooden board while pregnant? Check. Had to kill a bunch of Children of the Corn to rescue her daughter who was abducted by a close friend from before the world ended? Check. Had her heavily pregnant belly slashed by a 6-year-old? Check. While he was at it, why didn't he just cut RJ out for good measure?

And we're still confused about the actual point of this. Was this supposed to explain why Maggie and Tara have an attitude with Michonne? Or why Michonne don't want no new friends? We get it. Sometimes, in the zombie apocalypse, you meet people and they try to eat you. No wait-- you meet people and they try to take half of your stuff and make you slaves. No, that's not it. Here we go: you meet people and they kill you and carve a "W" in your head. See where we're going? This ain't new. Not sure why we needed to see Michonne kill some kids?

By the way, thanks for all the help, Daryl. And Judith, go to your room!

On the plus side, Danai was phenomenal. As if there was any doubt. We saw RJ and he's the perfect kid. And Jocelyn, if nothing else, gave us the perfect tagline for these Richonne movies: Go Find Your Man.

Be sure to check out Tai's work at Hypable, SyFyWire and Bustle!

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Special thanks to Eden Burning for providing our music, “Glitter Girl.” Check them out at Reverb Nation

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