70 - Adaptability Hacking w/ Dr. Yishai Barkhordari

She Sells Radio

Right now, more than ever we are being called to adapt. You may be sick of thinking about it by now, but we are at the beginning of a massive global shift in how we do business. If we don’t adapt now, we’re going to be left in the dust. If your mindset, your relationships, or even your brand is transforming, now is the time to leverage that. Our guest today is Dr. Yishai, a Psychologist and Executive Coach who helps leaders of multi-million dollar companies react powerfully, increase performance, and create win-win solutions.

When Dr. Yishai was younger, he would react to things, events, explosively. He knew there was a better way to field changes and challenges that came into his life. This meant he needed to get a handle on how he could become more adaptable. This life-long dedication to become as adaptable as possible lead him to where he is today.

If you’ve ever had a moment where you’re experiencing something and it’s uncomfortable, and you’re doing your best to not feel it -- tuning out and distracting ourselves -- then you pick up your phone and start scrolling, or you hear something you don’t like and you think about it but continue to listen, you’re ignoring what your body is telling you. Your brain is creating a reaction to draw your attention to what is important to you. At that moment, you are holding yourself back by ignoring and not addressing what you are feeling. When you pay attention to them, you can learn from them and understand how you can adapt to the situation. When you feel overwhelmed, know that the feeling is the signal, not the problem. Increasing your limit to handle that overwhelm is a skill. It takes practice and you can fumble sometimes, but the point is that we refuse to ignore and pass over a problem. The first step when you learn how to walk takes a lot of effort--in the same way, you will get better at processing and adapting to stressful situations.

Dr. Yishai talks a bit about to how breakthrough that discomfort. His first suggestion is to recruit help. We get a lot more growth through a relationship than trying to tough it out alone. Getting a therapist is a great first step to prevent that harm. Having the space to be heard is incredibly helpful. Equally useful is getting feedback from trusted people around you. Investing in that support is essential. Think about ways that work for you and your life to create that space to face it head-on.

Dr. Yishai shares with us an exercise we can do to practice our adaptability. There are three core components: Data, Direction, and Drive. Divide a piece of paper into these three sections.

The first section is data. Without data, we have no idea what exactly needs to be changed. Put everything that needs to shift here.

In the second section, put direction. Which way are you going to pivot? These can look like end results, but the important thing to notice here is understanding how you’ll get there.

The third is drive. If there’s no motivation, nothing gets done. Tap into what your drive is by connecting to what is important to you. What is meaningful and necessary? Write down what you’re excited about in the future in this section.