Manage episode 230389061 series 2497799
A plot twist can happen at any time in your life.
When you get a new cell phone, tablet, or computer, do you stick with the default settings or do you change the settings to your personal preferences? Most people change the settings. When you live a life by default, you are basically accepting what’s already been selected for you. We all know people who seem to experience the same set of challenges or obstacles over and over again, or who have the same or similar negative life events happen to them, regardless of where they are or what they are doing. You are a co-creator of your experiences and when you have internal stress, frantic pressure, and a doom or gloom mentality, your life reflects that back to you.
Here are some ways to tell if you are living life by default: (1) Do you constantly have a feeling that something is missing? (2) Are major aspects of your life decided by happenstance – things like your what you do on a daily basis, your career, your friends, your dating life, etc.? (3) Do you wake up each day and feel like you are simply reacting to what life is throwing at you? (4) You have no idea of what will truly make you happy. If you answered yes, you may be living a life by default.
Here are five tips to help you live a life by design instead of living a life by default:
- Get clear about what you really want out of life. That means defining what makes YOU happy.
- Now that you are clear about what you really want out of life, create a life plan. That means setting goals and achieving them. They don’t have to be big audacious goals. People think that their goals have to be something big to make a difference, and when they don’t reach the big goal, they feel unhappy, stressed, depressed or out of alignment. Small goals are just as important. It’s that practice of achieving the small goals that lead to even bigger goals. Achieving small goals build confidence to aim higher.
- You need purpose. Your purpose is your why. It’s that “thing” that makes your life fulfilling. It’s something that resonates deeply within your heart.
- Learn to be in the moment. According to a Harvard University study, almost half of our waking hours are spent NOT living in the moment. Half! Living in the moment is also associated with mindfulness. Mindfulness is the ability to be fully present, aware of where you are and what you’re doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around you.
- Live a life of gratitude. I will ALWAYS emphasize the importance of being grateful. Gratitude makes us happier. Research shows that gratitude increases mental strength, strengthens our emotions, increases our self-esteem, reduces aggression, improves psychological health, and improves physical health.