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When a young Eva Kollisch arrives as a refugee in New York in 1940, she finds a community among socialists who share her values and idealism. She soon discovers ‘the cause’ isn’t as idyllic as it seems. Little does she know this is the beginning of a lifelong commitment to activism and her determination to create radical change in ways that include belonging, love and one's full self. In addition to Eva Kollisch’s memoirs Girl in Movement (2000) and The Ground Under My Feet (2014), LBI’s collections include an oral history interview with Eva conducted in 2014 and the papers of Eva’s mother, poet Margarete Kolllisch, which document Eva’s childhood experience on the Kindertransport. Learn more at www.lbi.org/kollisch . Exile is a production of the Leo Baeck Institute , New York | Berlin and Antica Productions . It’s narrated by Mandy Patinkin. Executive Producers include Katrina Onstad, Stuart Coxe, and Bernie Blum. Senior Producer is Debbie Pacheco. Associate Producers are Hailey Choi and Emily Morantz. Research and translation by Isabella Kempf. Sound design and audio mix by Philip Wilson, with help from Cameron McIver. Theme music by Oliver Wickham. Voice acting by Natalia Bushnik. Special thanks to the Kollisch family for the use of Eva’s two memoirs, “Girl in Movement” and “The Ground Under My Feet”, the Sophia Smith Collection at Smith College and their “Voices of Feminism Oral History Project”, and Soundtrack New York.…
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Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.
Janna Denton-Howes: Marriage Coach | Sex Educator | Low Libido Expert
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Doing It Together is about empowering women and men to heal from cultural messages so that they can discover true pleasure and connection in their sexual relationship and marriage. This podcast addresses the common dynamic in a heterosexual relationship in which the wife doesn’t want and enjoy sex and the husband does. Too often, the focus is placed on labels like “low libido” and “low sex drive” without addressing the root issues including physical and emotional safety, shame, porn use, uni ...
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Escaping the Constraints of Traditional Gender Roles in Marriage - with Jaime & Josh Fisher | Ep. 136
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Janna discovered Jaime and Josh through their shared Instagram profile, @marriageishappening, and was so moved by their marriage story that she invited them to join her on the podcast. Married at 21 with four kids soon after, they initially adhered to traditional gender roles—Jaime stayed at home while Josh worked outside the house. Jaime, an extro…
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Keith continues his story from Episode 134, diving deeper into his experience of starting the Doing It Together (DIT) program with his wife. Having gone through his own therapy, Keith thought he was way ahead of the game when he began DIT. However, he quickly realized the role he played in his relationship dynamic was much more complex than he had …
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Breaking Free from the Traps of Tough-Guy Culture - with Keith (Part 1) | Ep. 134
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In this two-part episode, Keith shares the first part of his story. Growing up as a child of color, Keith learned early on what was and wasn’t acceptable to express around his family and friends, especially the men and boys. While the women in his life supported his artistic side and sensitivity, Keith feared being labeled as weak or ridiculed by t…
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In this enlightening episode, 40-year-old Brandi shares her inspiring journey of self-discovery and rekindled desire. Growing up in southern Utah within the Mormon faith, Brandi's sex education was rooted in the belief of abstinence until marriage. After her first marriage ended due to years of betrayal, she ventured into the eye-opening world of o…
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Kate and her husband started out having what she describes as a great sex life. It felt exciting, easy and fun and her pleasure was easily accessible. As the years passed and life got more stressful and overwhelming, her desire plummeted. She couldn’t understand what happened. She started keeping a calendar to track how often they had sex and if to…
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Couples Share How Their Relationship Thrived by Doing It Together | Ep. 131
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On the final day of the last round of Doing It Together, Janna and her team gathered all the husbands and wives for a farewell Zoom call. During this heartwarming session, she asked, "What’s been your most unexpected takeaway from this program?" The couples’ honest responses were deeply moving. After just eight weeks on their journey, they had alre…
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In this special episode, Janna talks with her coaching teammates, Justin and Melissa, about the upcoming round of Doing It Together, what couples can expect from the program, and common questions they are asked about low libido and sexual connection from both men and women. Justin and Melissa answer: What are men and women worried about when consid…
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From a young age, Kris learned to suppress his emotions and handle his feelings alone. His friends, family, and culture reinforced this mindset, showing him quick fixes for managing his growing anxiety, such as drinking alcohol, using drugs, or turning to adult entertainment. Over time, he became an expert at burying his emotions, but this came at …
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Overcoming Years of Silent Tension & Unspoken Emotions - with Chloe | Ep. 128
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Chloe and her husband, married for 12 years, struggled with their intimate relationship from the very beginning. However, they found it difficult to have honest conversations with each other. Both raised in Britain with the belief in keeping a “stiff upper lip,” discussing emotions or sensitive topics didn’t come naturally to them. Her husband’s mo…
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Tim's Journey from Confusion to Clarity in His 30-Year Marriage | Ep. 127
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Tim and his wife have been married for 30 years. Their initial connection was deep and fulfilling, but once they got married, something changed. His wife began to touch him less and less, and Tim felt rejected and confused. This led to frequent arguments. After their three kids moved out, Tim hoped things would improve, but they didn’t. He fell int…
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33-year-old Bri was convinced something was wrong with her. She hadn't been intimate with her husband in over two years, and their once passionate relationship had dwindled to a series of weekly arguments and frustrations on both sides. She was convinced she had low libido because she was too young to have lost interest in sex—what else could it be…
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Jason describes himself as an adventurous thrill-seeker, always in search of a rush. When he discovered the internet in college and the types of images and videos that could be accessed secretly and anonymously, it led him down a dark path marked by decades of manipulation, lying, and gaslighting as he tried to protect his secret behaviours. His ma…
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As a young girl trying to understand sex and sexuality, Kelly experienced a lot of shame from her parents and the small-town culture she grew up in. Without any sex education, she and her friends had to figure things out on their own, trying their best to support each other along the way. Now, as a mother raising two daughters, Kelly still sees the…
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Zack had always thought of himself as respectful towards women—until he confronted the reality of how his daily consumption of porn, starting at age 12, affected his relationship with his wife. For over 20 years, this habit was a part of his life, and though he never intended to objectify anyone, he learned that it deeply harmed his ability to conn…
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Janna is joined by Danielle, the creator, host, and executive producer of the Sex Ed with DB podcast. Danielle's current series, Rom-Com V🤮m, is a rewatch podcast focused on 90s and early 2000s rom-coms. In it, she unpacks the toxic lessons these films teach about sex and attempts to rewrite the script. In this episode, Janna and Danielle dive into…
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In this week’s episode, Janna sits down with Zoe, who shares her deeply personal journey through 30 years of struggles with intimacy in her marriage. For years, what was meant to be a natural part of life became a chore—a cycle of guilt, resentment, and exhaustion that left her feeling broken. Even after the kids moved out, Zoe thought the situatio…
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In this empowering solo episode of Doing It Together, host Janna Denton-Howes delves into the transformative power of self-advocacy for women. Janna, a seasoned relationship coach and sex educator, shares her insights on overcoming cultural barriers to embrace true pleasure and connection. Discover the essential stages of self-advocacy, the roadblo…
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Too often, societal pressures push women into roles where productivity and selflessness overshadow the importance of personal joy and connection. Instead of being encouraged to embrace their desires and fully experience their bodies, many women find themselves burdened by guilt, expectation, and a sense of duty to provide for others. This episode u…
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I have some very exciting news! After years of requests from thousands of women, I'm finally ready to launch a DIY video and journaling program specifically designed for women. This course is your first gentle step toward gaining clarity about your feelings toward sex. Wanting It More Foundations aims to empower women through reflection and observa…
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Am I Addicted? Signs of Sex & Porn Addiction and How To Heal - with Dr. Jake Porter | Ep. 117
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Janna is joined by licensed professional counselor Dr. Jake Porter to explore the complex dynamics of shame and secrecy surrounding pornography and sex addiction in relationships. They discuss the role of denial and defense mechanisms while emphasizing the value of the therapeutic disclosure process. Listeners will receive advice on where to seek h…
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Understanding the Overfunctioning Woman in Love with an Underfunctioning Partner - with Dr. Ashley Southard | Ep. 116
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Janna has an eye-opening conversation with Dr. Ashley Southard, a licensed marriage and family therapist of 22 years, about her work helping overfunctioning women in love with underfunctioning partners. They discuss what this dynamic looks like for both women and men, why women tend to take on the emotional labour for both partners, and what women …
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We are re-airing this episode in which Janna gathers with real couples who have completed the Doing It Together program and asks, “In what beneficial ways has the program impacted your life or marriage that you didn't expect?”. You'll hear from both men and women on what they learned and how they are applying this new knowledge to strengthen themse…
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Janna answers the most common questions she's asked by both men and women about her Doing It Together program. If you're considering joining the next round, this is a great short episode to listen to. To hear the wrap-up call with husbands and wives from last round, listen to Ep. 62. Janna's new Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for wom…
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With the next round of Doing It Together approaching, we’re excited to introduce Janna’s team and share their personal stories and insights. Melissa and Justin, both alumni of the program, discuss their experiences of taking the program, what participants can expect from the 8-week course, and their dedication to changing the narrative around low l…
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Sandra shares her incredible journey of transforming painful sexual experiences into a space of safety and pleasure. She recalls how, in the early days of her marriage, she and her husband were deeply connected and satisfied with their intimate life. However, after the traumatic birth of her fifth child, Sandra suffered a severe pelvic injury that …
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How Men Can Rethink Their Roles To Support Gender Equality - with author Michael Kaufman | Ep. 111
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Janna chats with Michael Kaufman, the author of The Time Has Come: Why Men Must Join the Gender Equality Revolution. Michael, a renowned advisor, activist, and keynote speaker, shares his insights on how traditional male roles in the bedroom and beyond often don’t benefit women. They dive into why it's crucial for men to confront their own privileg…
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Janna speaks with Ericka about the use of alcohol and how it can become a crutch in intimate situations. Ericka started drinking in high school, initially finding that alcohol eased her anxiety and helped her feel more relaxed before sexual encounters. However, this pattern led to risky situations and a troubling reliance on alcohol to numb out her…
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We are rebroadcasting one of Janna's favorite episodes: her fascinating conversation with Dr. Tina Schermer Seller, a licensed therapist who specializes in sex and gender issues. Dr. Schermer Seller is the author of one of Janna's favorite and most recommended books, Sex, God, & the Conservative Church – Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy. In this …
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REAIR: How to Trust Your Partner Again After Cheating and Porn Addiction - with betrayal trauma expert Michelle Mays | Ep. 108
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We are rebroadcasting our very popular episode with betrayal trauma expert Michelle Mays. Partner betrayal is SO complex compared to other forms of trauma. The lying, manipulation, scapegoating and gaslighting create a cycle of shame of wanting to simultaneously connect and disconnect from a cheating partner. Michelle shares her own betrayal story …
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REAIR: Understanding Pain During Sexual Intercourse - with Pelvic Floor Expert Mandy Röscher | Ep. 107
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We're re-airing one of our most popular episodes (Ep. 27) with Mandy Röscher, a Pelvic Health Physiotherapist based in Brisbane, Australia who specializes in chronic pelvic pain conditions. Painful experiences in the bedroom are unfortunately extremely common for women. Mandy share her extensive knowledge and training with us to shed some light on …
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How to Reverse Pelvic Organ Prolapse Naturally - with guest expert Jennie Delreeve | Ep. 106
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For 24 years, Jennie Delreeve has been a beacon of hope for women overcoming trauma and reversing pelvic organ prolapse naturally, helping them reclaim their active lifestyles. Jennie’s journey began with her own experience of prolapse, which plunged her into a cycle of shame and fear. She soon discovered that the mental tension she carried was sig…
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Stacey, a 42-year-old physical therapist, described her sex life as feeling like she was on autopilot. Her experiences were neither particularly good nor bad but rather monotonous and formulaic. She sensed there was something more to discover. To her shock and surprise, she had no idea how much she had to learn until she met Janna. Stacey shares wh…
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In this special episode, Janna reunites with Justin and Sandra, a couple who have each appeared on the podcast separately before (Justin in Episode 82 and Sandra in Episode 74). Together, they tackle some of the most frequently asked questions from Janna’s community, such as: How do you cultivate emotional safety and connection in your relationship…
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Why Having Kids Complicates Your Sex Life and What to Do About It - with Amanda | Ep. 103
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Amanda, 35, has always enjoyed sex. She explored with confidence from an early age and used the term "great sex" to describe her intimate life with her husband. But everything changed when they had kids. As a mother of four, Amanda found that sex transformed from fun and fulfilling into a vicious cycle of guilt, pressure, rejection, and shame. With…
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Celeste truly felt like she found her soul mate when she married her husband. She loved him deeply and could be her authentic self in their marriage...except during sex. She couldn’t understand how she could love someone so much yet dislike the sexual experience so intensely. She could never find the right words to express her feelings and would of…
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At 51, Heather is finally discovering what truly brings her pleasure in sexual experiences by asking herself, “What do I need?” Although she was once a curious and precocious sexual being, her desire diminished during marriage when sex became an expectation and duty. The traditional formula of what sex should be didn't work for her and depleted her…
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It's our 100th episode! To celebrate, I'm announcing a big change: a name change. As I've evolved over the years and learned from the couples I've served, so has my program. After adding an entire men's coaching and education program to Wanting It More, I realized the name needed to reflect a broader perspective. I was no longer exclusively speakin…
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Breaking Free from the "Good Girl" to "Good Wife" Expectation - with Crystal | Ep. 99
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Crystal is a self-defined good girl. Since childhood, she was expected to, and praised for, doing as she was told and not rocking the boat. While this behavior was effective in her formative years, her passive nature had consequences on multiple levels in her 25-year marriage, including in the bedroom. Crystal shares her struggle with speaking up f…
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Tyler and his wife struggled with intimacy throughout their 11 years of marriage. After meeting at 16 and waiting until marriage four years later, they both expected that the sexual experience would bring joy and fun to their lives, but it did not. His wife was plagued by pain, and after having two children, the exhaustion and stress of their lives…
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Emma vividly remembers losing her libido during her honeymoon. She and her husband had waited until marriage to have intercourse for the first time, and both were eagerly anticipating it. Initially, the experience was wonderful, but soon her desire vanished and never returned. For years, she tried everything she could think of to "fix" herself. She…
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Where Did My Libido Go? Overcoming Medical Hurdles & Misguided Advice - with Samantha | Ep. 96
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At 56, Samantha felt like her libido was lost without a map. She had faced medical issues, including adenomyosis and a full hysterectomy, but she knew her diminished desire went deeper than just these physical challenges. Intimacy with her husband had once been enjoyable, but her desire had gradually faded away without explanation. The advice from …
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The Dual Lives of Men: Investigating the Compartmentalization of Porn Use - with Andreas | Ep. 95
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How and why do men separate the effects of their pornography use from their marriage? Andreas and Janna extensively discuss the rapid development of his addictive use of adult entertainment throughout his life, the reasons why he used it, his hundreds of failed attempts to quit, and what finally worked to become sober and save his marriage. Andreas…
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Colin grew up with two therapist parents, one of whom was a sex therapist. He learned a lot about emotions, sex, safety, consent, and talking openly from them. These things were really important to him and shaped his core values as he became a man. His wife also thought he was very caring, gentle, and understanding. But despite this, their sex life…
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Kelly loved her husband of 20 years, but she noticed a change in her feelings toward intimacy over time, and she couldn't understand why. After some of their friends surprised them with divorce news, her husband worried about their own relationship, even though Kelly felt secure. He thought the solution was for him to become more attractive, so he …
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Nancy unfolds her 71-year journey, delving into three significant relationships and the tumultuous experiences within each. Enduring emotional abandonment, financial instability, and a constant sense of being invisible and invalidated, she shares the poignant struggle of feeling like a solitary voice crying out, yet unheard. However, amidst this tu…
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Why are women conditioned to endure pain? Natalie reveals the multitude of reasons she persisted through painful sexual experiences with her husband for 27 years of their marriage. It wasn’t until she discovered Wanting It More that she realized the detrimental extent of what she was subjecting her body and mind to in order to fulfill societal expe…
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David’s wife spent years expressing her dissatisfaction with their sex life, repeatedly sharing her feelings, but David remained skeptical. Despite her efforts, he couldn't accept her perspective. Influenced by adult entertainment and misinformation, he believed he was doing everything right, yet she didn't respond as expected, leading him to concl…
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Overcoming Betrayal Trauma, Addiction, & Lack of Safety in the Bedroom - with Michele | Ep. 89
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Michele bravely opens up about her tumultuous journey through relationships as a woman in her late 50s. She recounts the harrowing experiences of enduring compulsive lying, cheating, porn and sex addiction, abuse, and a pervasive lack of consent. Amidst the darkness, she discovered a beacon of hope in Janna, whose guidance led Michele on a transfor…
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We delve into Raina's journey of rediscovering her desire for sex within her marriage. Despite a healthy upbringing with decent sexual education, positive body image, and safe and secure sexual experiences, Raina found herself losing interest in intimacy with her husband after getting married. After starting a personal journey which she affectionat…
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When Lisa took the Wanting It More program a couple of years ago, she never imagined the valuable lessons she learned to improve her low libido would also come in handy when confronting a medical issue. Lisa talks in detail about her struggles with body image anxiety and gynecological exams that accompanied her journey to the diagnosis of Lichen Sc…
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