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Football Ramble

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The Football Ramble is a global podcasting institution. Since 2007, the Ramble has provided entertainment, analysis and coverage of the Premier League and beyond for football fans who don't take the world's biggest sport too seriously. In 2025, the takes are as strong as ever, the jokes are as funny as ever and the Ramble remains as essential as it ever was for football fans everywhere. Join them throughout the week as they discuss the world's biggest football stories in their inimitable sty ...
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Well, it looks like the three sides promoted from the Champo last season are heading straight back down to the second tier. Kieran McKenna and his boys have given the Premier League a good go, but it's just not happening for them and Leicester this season...Need we even mention Southampton? Elsewhere, Marcus, Luke & Vish react to the fresh demands …
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Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete gather the ticker tape after Liverpool cruised to a straightforward win at the Etihad - but should they have gone for the jugular? And Arsenal… any danger?! Elsewhere, Newcastle blitzed Nottingham Forest, Everton continue to improve under David Moyes and we throw our hat in the ring for more Man United leaks. Plus, Fizze…
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The Champions League knockout play-offs (is that really what we're calling them?) served up plenty of drama as part of the new format, but are they really worth keeping given the ever-increasing demands of the football calendar? Marcus, Jim & Andy give their thoughts on that, plus they answer who they think is the most underrated manager of all tim…
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An Austrian manager’s team talk has made headlines this week and somehow the fact that he waving a dildo around in front of his players isn’t the most confusing detail about it… Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish log into UEFA.com (and quickly log back out again) before checking in with the best of the Prem action this weekend. Vish realises that the best …
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Man City were so bad that they forced Marcus to do his best Graeme Souness impression… oh dear. Jim joins him to wonder when was the last time a British club gave such a poor performance in Europe. Elsewhere, Liverpool and Aston Villa offered up the perfect tonic at Villa Park. But is it too early for Jim to sound the “title race is back on” alarm?…
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Marcus, Luke, Jim and Pete catch their breath after a chaotic night of European football which saw Bayern get past a spirited Celtic without even using Eric Dier or Vincent Kompany’s studded cowboy boots. We also recap head loss deluxe across the rest of Europe, with awful diving and embarrassing tantrums aplenty. Elsewhere, a Liverpool fan opens t…
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Right, before we get onto another Juan Bernabe update, things really are starting to heat up in the battle for the Premier League’s European places. From third down to seventh, it could be anyone’s game - so who do Marcus, Luke & Pete think are going to snatch those coveted four (maybe five) places come the end of the season? But yes, Bernabe is ba…
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Marcus, Luke and Pete dust themselves down and go again after Spurs and Man United played out a disappointing damp squib. Even the managers’ meagre war of words did little to tickle our fancy… To be fair, the rest of the Premier League weekend did throw up some interesting stories as Newcastle graciously got battered by Man City once again and Fulh…
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After the simply marvellous scenes at Goodison Park this week, some fun sponges had the audacity to say that the Everton players and fans went 'too far' with their celebrations. Now, it's not the first time we've heard that in recent times. Myles Lewis-Skelly ruffled a few feathers after copying Erling Haaland's celebration, and Paul Scholes called…
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On this lovely Valentine's Day, it’s important to focus all your love and attention on that Special One. So, with no English teams in European action last night, we kick off with more ridiculous antics from football’s favourite loverboy, José Mourinho. Marcus, Luke, Vish and Jim then look ahead to a mid-table Mourinho Derby as Spurs’ perfectly stop…
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Don't pretend you don't want to see it. Everton vs Liverpool ended in complete carnage and Marcus and Jim loved every single second. Still giddy from all the excitement, we credit the Everton fans for celebrating with the appropriate level of vigour, while also being thankful that VAR didn’t ruin it all. And despite all that, we still find time to …
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It’s happened again. Man City have blown a lead and Jude Bellingham scored a late winner. Who would have thought? Elsewhere, Marcus, Jim, Pete and Andy are impressed by Jason Tindall who has reached new levels of sh*thousery. Plus, Lazio's former falconer Juan Bernabé and his eagle are back! We’re going on tour! Get your tickets now: https://footba…
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The only thing to take from Crystal Palace’s Professional Job 2-0 Plucky Doncaster Rovers: scrap the entire football pyramid. Rubbish, don’t need it. In all seriousness, Marcus and Vish tip their hats to a valiant effort from Doncaster and realise that Palace are properly decent under Oliver Glasner. Plus, we peruse the fifth round matchups and Man…
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Worried about the magic spilling out of the FA Cup? Well, Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete - with a little help from Plymouth Argyle - are here to refill the Cup with the recommended level of magic. Elsewhere, we thank Stefan Ortega for ensuring Jamie Donley achieved one of the great FA Cup assists and we try to talk about quite literally anything other…
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After Mario Lemina's banishment to Turkey, plus Marcus Rashford and Jadon Sancho being shipped away from Manchester United, are we seeing managers regaining decision-making power over the futures of their players? And with Neymar making his return to Santos, Marcus, Vish, and Andy ask: Is it fair to say that he's underachieved in his career? We’re …
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Is it insane to compare Mo Salah to Prime Messi? Andy explains to Marcus, Jim and Vish why he thinks you can draw parallels between the two. Elsewhere, the FA Cup fourth round is here! Is it equally mad to say that the Championship’s Burnley are favourites against Southampton? Plus, the Premier League discuss employing an actual celebration police.…
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Join Newcastle’s celebrated midfield duo - Pete Donaldson and Andy Brassell - as they lead the Geordie parade to their second Carabao Cup final in three seasons after mugging off Arsenal once again! We marvel at some Alexander Isak brilliance and give Jacob Murphy the props he deserves. Plus, why were Arsenal so rattled? Why do they always struggle…
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Pete’s got an idea for a new digital currency. He tells Marcus and Luke why we should all be interested by the prospect. Elsewhere, Luke fondly reminisces about transfer deadline days gone by and Marcus tells us about a player who was sent off for pissing. Plus, we get ready for a week of juicy Carabao goodness! We’re going on tour! Get your ticket…
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Chelsea came back from 1-0 down to earn only their second league win in almost two months. Marcus and Vish accuse Enzo Maresca’s men of protesting against the suggestion that they were in a title race. Elsewhere, we wonder whether Evan Ferguson is the player to break West Ham’s striker curse. Plus, João Félix adds another beautiful shirt to his alr…
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What do Declan Rice and Ed Sheeran have in common? Luke is here to tell Marcus, Jim and Pete just that after Arsenal thwacked Man City at the Emirates. Elsewhere, Pete ponders whether it’s time to officially declare Chris Wood a Master Craftsman now that he has completed his 10,000 hours. Plus, David Moyes keeps shoving a load of egg in Sean Dyche’…
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"It's who we are, mate." Sure, but can you not do anything else? From Ange Postecoglou to Vincent Kompany, and even our good friend Russell Martin, managers seem to be stuck in a single mindset when it comes to playing the game. But if it fails once, then twice, and a few more times after that, why don’t they change their approach? Marcus, Jim & Vi…
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Kobbie Mainoo is having a lovely time playing further forward for Man United. But of course, Marcus must ask Andy, Vish and Jim: What does that mean for his England prospects? Elsewhere, Jim is uncertain about Arsenal's attempts to buy Ollie Watkins. We also try to work out what food the Fulham fans will be eating on the way to Newcastle this weeke…
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Pete, Luke and Andy have a supersized hangover after last night’s Champions League Royal Rumble. So let’s get through as many games as we can remember! And no Andy, we’re not talking about Crvena zvezda, you perv. Aston Villa barged past Celtic courtesy of John McGinn’s bum and an epic Morgan Rogers hat-trick, while Man City narrowly avoided an emb…
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Tonight you’re faced with a big decision, do you watch the Champions League or the German edition of I’m a Celebrity? Well, panic not. Marcus, Luke and Vish are here to tell you how you can watch both at the same time! The lads also get excited for tonight’s Champions League bonanza by trying to work out whether Agent De Bruyne will sabotage Man Ci…
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After a flurry of games over the festive and winter periods, it's time to take a step back and ponder on what has been and what's to come in the Premier League this season. Marcus, Luke & Jim reflect on the fall of the Goliaths and the rise of the Davids that we've seen play out this season. Find us on Bluesky, X, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and…
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